Archive for Self-indulgence

Woken by a dream

I woke up this morning at about 6.  I was laughing and couldn’t stop.  I’d just thought of the best joke ever.

The dream I’d been having had me running a half marathon – ok that’s not right.  But I was and it was over roughish ground.  I wasn’t tired or anything and was running with friends.

We finished and I noticed the time I’d done it in was 2 hours and 23 minutes.  Whatever.

Then as we were packing up and getting ready to drive home I noticed that my friends were now Willow and Xander from off of Buffy.  And I was Giles.  And that’s when the joke hit me.

I kept trying to tell them the joke but couldn’t as whenever I tried I collapsed into fits of giggles which stopped me.

And then I woke up, giggling and struggling to stop.  I think the giggling was at least partly due to me failing to get through it without laughing and watching their “oh my god what’s he going to say” faces in my dream.  And it still makes me giggle.

Now I write it down the joke isn’t all that but that’s dreams for you.

Anyway:

“As Meatloaf would have said – two twenty three ain’t bad”.

Oh but you should have been there.

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MUCOOCB

I may have mentioned that I listen to a bunch of podcasts.  One of them is the Rhod Gilbert show from Radio Wales.  It’s a particularly fine show with great co-hosts.

Anyway one feature he has is “Celebrity Out of Context Bingo” – which is where people can email in telling Rhod about an encounter they have had with a celebrity in which the celebrity is ironically doing the opposite of something they’re known for.  For instance perhaps – that bloke from Antiques Roadshow buying something new and shiny.  The small print of the rules are quite tricky and are regularly picked apart by the guests.  The main point ends up being – if it’s funny it’ll get on.

Someone wrote one about Ian McKellen which was quite clearly made up so I wrote one to point this out.  It only got on!

Anyway here it is from the show.

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Migraine 2 – The Return of the Aura

On Monday I was at work and the desk to my right started flashing blue.  On second look it was just the far right side of my vision that was flashing and it wouldn’t go away.  Now I’ve only ever had 1 migraine before but have learned enough to know that this was the onset of another.  Great, still a few hours of work to get through.

Anyway I tried soldiering on but had to stop.  I tried paracetamol but that didn’t have much effect.  Eventually I tried resting in the darkened room for an hour.  No real benefit so then I headed home to my darkened bedroom.  It all eased off well in the afternoon thankfully.

And now I’ve got a rotten throat.

Great week for health.

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Car Wars Episode 6 – Return of the Engine Light

So the Galaxy is gone. Yay.  The Skoda has been our most solid car ever – highly recommended.  Anyway R has been telling me that the car “judders” and the engine light has been coming on.  So I drive it a few times and there’s an engine light on at first but no juddering.  After stopping at work for a few hours I get in it again and no engine light and no juddering.

Next day R gets in it again and texts that the light is back on and it judders.

This pattern repeats a couple of times.

So today it was MOT day – no light and no judder, great.

Then, on the way to the garage, the light came on and I felt the judder for the first time.  Good timing.

The car did pass its MOT though and the guy said that the error was a fuel injector being bunged up.  He stuck a fuel treatment in and said that might help.  With a bit of luck it’ll last long enough for us to sell the thing.

We’ll see.

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A bit of a headache

Last weekend we went to Warwick Castle for a day out.  The kids loved it.

But this was a weird one.

When driving there I had a weird light thing flashing into my right eye – it kept recurring and was an irritant but only that.

Once there N wanted to do the dungeon excursion – think a London Dungeon type thing – age 10 or over only.  Whilst sat waiting I started to get a headache behind my left eye.  Wasn’t fun.  Once in it was all dark and claustrophobic.  The first 2 rooms were ok, N loved the “chef”.  Then we got into the torturer’s room – I was getting more headache and it felt a bit like my eye was pushing forwards.  N hated this room – wasn’t scared by it but upset by the thoughts of what this kind of man would do to his victims.  Anyway she wanted to leave.  We did – I was pleased as it meant I could crash out on the floor for a bit.

N took the kids away whilst I sat down on a step for a bit.  This lasted quite a while as my headache got worse and worse.  Absolutely horrible.  Eventually 2 staff members came and got me and took me to a quiet room to lie down for a bit.  R went to buy some paracetamol for me.  A great way to spend our day out.

Turns out I just had a migraine – a first for me.

Then I googled “first migraine after 40” and wished I hadn’t.  So to the GP in the week for reassurance.  Grr.

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Car wars

I was in Nottingham yesterday afternoon for work.  The plan was to zoom back to Derby to pick up Tomas the handy mechanic and then whisk him off to Mansfield to see another car.  All in rush hour.

So I get there at 5:15 to pick him up and off we go. 30 minutes later we’re called by R to let us know that the bloke has already sold the car we were going to see.

And AAARRRGHHH!

So today after work (again in Nottingham) I need to zoom off, this time to Wirksworth, to have a look at yet another possibility.

Sigh.

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Flapjacks

Ma wrote me this recipe a while back and I keep losing it and forgetting it so I’m leaving it here hence I’ll be able to find it occasionally!

 

4oz butter
1 oz sugar
2tablespoons golden syrup, warmed
8 oz oats

Heat oven to moderate (175 or mark 4).

Grease a tin measuring about 8 x 10 inches. I use a 6 or 7 inch sandwich cake tin.
Beat the butter and sugar until the mixture is creamy, then stir in the warmed syrup.
Then stir in the rolled oats.

(I put syrup, butter and sugar in a saucepan and heat until all melted. Very carefully. In order to measure the syrup I heat the tbspn in hot water or over the gas ring before scooping it out of the tin. It will then slide off the spoon.
Also you could include sunflower seeds or chopped nuts in the oats – not too many though.)

Press into the tin and bake until golden brown. When taking it out of the oven mark into portions but do not remove from the tin until cold or it will break up.

 

Ta Ma.

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Bungay Ballsed Up

Now well this is a different kind of post.  Mostly confessional and an explicit apology.

Sunday morning at BBU.  See previous post to see details of 2 sleepless nights and feeling a bit out of sorts.

Anyways breakfast.  The kids had been promised pancakes.  I cooked them some.  But then a pathetic petty disagreement with N happened.  In normal circumstances this would have been very ignorable but the combination of tiredness and general stressiness didn’t work well in my favour.  And I completely flipped out.  Ludicrous over the top shouting and snark and basically being a total tosser.

I managed to spot it and absented myself from the situation and had a lie down.

I apologised later to N and R.

BUT I also want to apologise to those nearby who clearly would have heard this ranting imbecile flipping out at a 10 year old about something so bloody trivial as a sodding pancake.

I am an idiot.  Sorry.

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Birthday butterflies

Me and L both had our birthdays this weekend(ish).

Little L is now 3 (and very proud of the fact) and to celebrate we didn’t go down the route of having a party for her but instead we headed off up to near Sheffield to the Butterfly House.

But we’re ahead of ourselves.  A local author has finally got her first novel published along with a deal for a further 2 books.  To celebrate she held a do at her place on Satdy which we all went to.  There were loads of folk there including a good number of other young folk for our kids to play with.  It was a little loud for me and I struggled to hear much of what was being said by anyone; too much noisy music in past years no doubt.  Mind you R did say that she found it difficult to hear much as well.

At around 8pm I went home with the 2 wee ones and put them to bed.  This left N and R at the party.  I think the evening was spent by me playing Super Mario Galaxy.  Marvellous.

N came back at around 10, she was complaining of being very tired – hardly a surprise.  I went to bed not long after.  R came back very late after much merriment.

So Sunday began a little later than originally planned but that was ok.  I felt queasy and dizzy first thing and R was not on top form that early in the day so after L had her cards and presents we headed back up to bed for another hour of sleep.  We came down later to the 3 kids putting stickers in a Peppa Pig book and having a great time.

Then off to see butterflies and more.  The Butterfly House was one of the nicer small zoos I’ve been to.  There were plenty of things to see, demoes to watch, and spiders to “urgh” at.  And there were some butterflies too.

I have photos to put up but there are a lot of them to sort through.  I’ll be on it one day soon.

Then yesterday I was given a lovely bacon croissant for my breakfast and people came over to wish me and L a happy bday.  Cake was had and L blew out her 3 candles – she did look a tad nervous of the group of people singing at her tho.

And this weekend coming we’re off to the old folk’s place to celebrate pop’s 70th (ok yes it was last Friday but nowt happened then).  See you on Satdy pops.

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There’s a lot of crap around

Well isn’t the news fun recently?

We’ve had executions, burnings, bombings, shootings, threats and war.  Russia seems to think that the west cares about subjugating them hence is deciding that invading other countries will stop the west hating them.  China is flexing its muscles over the Pacific.  And Turkey is led by an idiot who thinks that Turkey needs a presidential palace rather than a secure future.  Why Turkey? Well it’s a NATO member with the power to cut off the Black Sea – handy when it’s access to the Black Sea that Russia wanted with Crimea.

Then we have men the world over who think women should just shut up and do what they’re told.  Women who think their daughters should have horrific scars to their genitals, because “it’s the done thing”.  Children being trained in using weaponry.

And then UK politics has gone down the pan.

  • Conservatives are all in it together with the rest of us.  Benefits for the poorest and most vulnerable get cut but then so does tax for the wealthiest.  That’s all good and fair.  The NHS won’t get a “top-down reorganisation” and won’t be sold off.  But gets an immediate “top-down reorganisation” and is being sold off.  There “are no plans to raise VAT”, but VAT is immediately raised.  And on and on.
  • Labour seem to have become the most ineffective bunch of PR spouting nobodies led by someone almost universally derided (unfairly no doubt but still).  No possibly controversial policies because that would mean people may not vote for them.  Really?  The party that set up the NHS, brought in worker’s rights (paid time off and maternity leave, benefits from cradle to grave etc) has no policies of note?  Certainly nothing like maybe nationalising the railways or power utilities – hell even tory voters want those things.  Useless tosspots the lot of them.
  • Lib Dems – spineless goons enabling the worst of the tory lot – the less said about them the better.
  • UKIP – one man band changing policy on the fly when it’s noted that it’s a rubbish idea (flat tax is one example).  Based on an “everyman” illusion as the men involved are all far right public school tories who work in banking and investment.  Tell me again which sector completely failed which led to the total screwing up on the western economy for years?  We could have secured bloody nuclear fusion for the amount of money (£1.5 trillion – how much better would it have been if we’d just given that money evenly to the population – we might then be able to afford houses and food and gas bills instead of not being able to get mortgages and loans now – that £1.5 trillion is £25000 each per person in the UK) we bailed these idiots out with!  Great party to vote for if you don’t want maternity leave, minimum wage, unfair dismissals tribunals, the NHS, or a planet worth inhabiting.  And tacitly endorsed by Russia – our bestest friends.
  • The Greens – radical ideas.  But as Yes Prime Minister said – the worst thing a civil servant can tell a minister is “That’s a brave policy”.  People haven’t warmed to the ideas yet.  Some of the policies look deeply stupid – see women’s prisons and universal salary – but we’ll never know as they’re hardly going to get the chance to present them.

And then the voting system is so stupid that any smaller parties are stymied by the first past the post method.  We could have had something better but the public didn’t bloody vote for it – so hard luck.  Carry on whinging about the two main parties you’re now stuck with because you couldn’t see far enough to change that damn system.  Idiots.

And then you get the morons that see that their vote doesn’t count so they don’t.  And then the more famous tell others not to – Russell bloody Brand I’m looking at you.

So the winners get in with 30% of the vote, which might only be 60% turnout so that’s what 20% of the electorate.  Then they have the balls to call that a mandate.  But then it doesn’t matter because they’ll go against what they promised immediately anyway (see Cons NHS stuff) with no sanction available to anyone – what’s the bloody point of a manifesto if it’s in no way binding?

Ah what’s the bloody point.

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