21 Dec 2011
Not just me then
Seems I’m not the only one who wants to see people do well (as per here):
Lovely article in the Grauniad.
16 Dec 2011
That’s why I like this stuff
I’ve mentioned before my approval of the show “America’s Next Top Model”. This does surprise people who know me (and probably disappoints others). I wasn’t sure quite why I liked it for a while but I figured it out yesterday.
People have assumed that I like it because of young and pretty girls being involved but that’s absolutely not it. There’s no creepy voyeurism involved at all, there’s just not that kind of content. What there IS is a group of young women who want to be models and then they have challenges, support and photo shoots. At the end of each episode one is voted off until there’s only one left at the end of the series. Through a series the remaining contenders get more and more input to their careers with advice from photographers, agents, magazine editors, designers, catwalk trainers and the like. In other words it guides them (a little, it’s not a school for aspirational girls). At the end the last 5 or so get some serious prizes such as travel abroad, challenges that win them shoots and campaigns across the world, one girl won herself a car this year as well as becoming the face of some bag designer’s new ads. So they are supported and the stuff that is created through the series’s photoshoots is some wonderful art and photography.
What is conspicuously missing is the leering theatre of idiocy that so infects stuff like “The X Factor” and “Britons Have Talent” (edited for grammar). There are no episodes of laughing at the deluded. This is what buggered up this year’s Britain’s Next Top Model. The producers clearly thought “Ha the X Factor is very popular therefore we will copy it”. And it was rubbish. I don’t want to point and laugh; I want to be impressed and see people doing well.
What happened last night was the final of “Masterchef: The Professionals”. It was wonderful. In fact since the semi-finals it’s been some of the best TV I’ve seen in ages. Technically the editing was spot on, the judges know their stuff and the contenders have bags of skill. The final was stuffed full of amazing skill and it was a shame that there had to be a “winner”. But there was and he was a very worthy winner. I want to eat some of his food. But then again I’d have been happy with eating food from any of the contestants. Again what we didn’t have was some deluded folks being laughed at. These were skilled people doing damn well and stretching themselves. Wonderful.
Can we have more like this please?
26 Nov 2011
Bare aliens!
Saw “Attack the Block” innit. It was well ….. erm I can’t do the youth speak nonsense that these tedious neets witter on with all through the thing.
I love my Adam and Joe whenever they’re on radio or telly and this fillum was written and directed by Joe so I was looking forward to it. I listen to Radio 5′s fillum reviews with Mark Kermode and Simon Mayo and heard reviews and discussion about the thing when it came out. As far as I remember it was very much “not as funny or scary as it should be”.
I don’t recall much at all in the way of comedy from it if I’m honest. Not much laughter from me. I did enjoy the fillum but only as a bit of popcorn fodder.
There were some startlingly obvious scene setting points. At one stage a kid wants to do some parkour style move where he jumps from a bridge to a stairwell but it’s too far and the other kids laugh at him so he doesn’t try. DING! He’ll manage that jump at some later point in the fillum then possibly whilst running away from the aliens. DING! Correct one point to me.
The main kid will realise through the peril he’s brought to himself and his block that he has to grow up a bit and take reponsibility for the effects of his actions. DING! Second point to me.
This second point was rammed home unrelentingly towards the end of the thing. First the girls in the fillum more or less tell him this. Then you’ve got the nurse who they mugged at the beginning more or less telling him this. And finally you’ve got scenes of him wrestling with it himself. All a bit linear and obvious really.
SPOILER ALERT (But remember that spoilers ENHANCE your pleasure of a story)
He may well save the planet at the end but he’s a horrible character. Drug running, mugging, violent piece of dirt. There may be a fillum out there that tells the story of why these kids turn out like this but this wasn’t it. One scene had one kid complaining that the cops just nick them “for nothing”. Oh “nothing” seems to include having the proceeds of muggings on them, knife carrying, drug carrying, carrying fireworks as offensive weapons etc etc… Not sure I want to root for such a lowlife.
And the sheer lack of ambition of these kids was very disheartening. R’s worked with neets and she said that the fillum depicted them very well, so point to Joe there. Makes me quite depressed thinking how we can dig these folk out of the holes they, to a large extent, dig for themselves. Talk about screwing yourself up. Ah but then it’s everyone else’s fault innit?
Sigh.
Nice aliens though.
04 Oct 2011
Duck Martin
We were bored last night. Recent Monday have been BINTM nights but it finished last week. So after food we were channel hopping and came across Doc Martin on that ITV starring Martin Clunes. R commented that I’d like it as her from The IT Crowd is in it.
Turns out she isn’t any more.
Well wow it was a dull show. No drama, no comedy. Just not good enough for a comedy drama. The plot such as it was, was flimsy mother in law type stuff. It was very odd to watch what is effectively a prime-time show for a change and to see very little of any substance whatsoever. The actors were all doing alright, no worries with their skills but the dross they had to work with.
Wonder if anyone can get a boring script made for ITV? Still if you like spending time with amiable people then this would be your bag.
03 Oct 2011
Of Monks and Monkeys
We watched “Of Gods and Men” the other night. Well what a lovelily made fillum. It’s a slow paced one though so if Transformers is your sort of thing then I wouldn’t bother.
It’s a case in what happens when the outside world intrudes into a cloistered life. We have a bunch of monks (I think that’s the correct collective noun) living in Algeria doing their helping the community stuff and living in complete harmony with the locals. The difference in religions mean little to either party and they all mingle happily. At one point the monks are invited to someone’s son’s party (sort of a religious coming of age thing) and are welcomed warmly and they, in turn, are happy to be there. In other words the monks are locals just like anyone else.
But then the civil war kicks off and foreigners are being killed and girls without veils are stabbed on buses etc. All very unpleasant.
The monks themselves are a mixed bunch and very well drawn characters. Some are old and fatalistic but happy with whatever happens, the youngest monk is terrified more than any. The trials of the group form the second half of the fillum. Tis lovely.
A wonderfully warm and poignant study of faith, brotherhood, neighbourliness and duty. I shan’t divulge the ending though.
Yesterday we went to a monkey place. We were expecting a bunch of different monkeys but instead there were lots of 1 particular type. In fact they were from North Africa, indeed the same place as the fillum was set. Barbary Macaques they were.
J wasn’t too impressed but everyone else was. Nice place.
12 Sep 2011
Och Captain! The Guy-ropes cannae take it!
They said it couldn’t be done. Some said it shouldn’t be done. Hah! We went and showed them.
Camping on Skye at the fag end of summer was always going to be a bit of a rough trip but the rewards of the place seemed to compensate handsomely.
We took 2 days to get here after a brief diversion to Rebecca and Matt’s wedding in London (most inconsiderately 100-odd miles in the wrong direction I might add). We split the drive so we didn’t have to do 10 hours plus of driving and then have to pitch a large tent.
Our chosen overnight spot was Fort William where we kipped over at a lovely B&B run by a mad old bat who never so much asked for a deposit. Nicer and cheaper than a Travelodge type place (not that they’re particularly abundant once you get north of the M8 anyhoo). The next day was a dash to Mallaig to get the ferry and then further to the campsite at Glen Brittle.
I’d never been to Skye before but ooh what a lovely place!
The campsite is situated at the end of a 7 mile single track road, between the black and grey beach and the Cuillan mountains. Tame birds flit around the tents picking up scraps and local rabbits hoppity around too. Didn’t see any eagles though. Most of the tents there were of the 2 man variety. Our 6 man job was amongst the bigger ones there. No matter, on arrival the weather was benign and calm. Set-up was easy and then the holiday can begin. After signing in at the campsite shop (“You can’t get refunds on camping but you can pay night by night if you want to” said the about 12 year old boy who seemed to be in charge) I needed the loo. We’d been given the code when we paid but it didn’t seem to work on the men’s loos. This was a problemfor a couple of days. At first it was a pain but eventually the air of cameraderie it engendered was excellent. Standing with a bunch of men outside the door figuring something out, commonly ways to block the door closing, became a regular event for me. After about 4 days the campsite buckled and took the lock away to be mended.
Our first full day was one of walking. We’d decided to head along the peninsula walk. Again the weather held but on the way back the clouds gathered over the Cuillans and it looked like there’d be some storms heading our way.
Well it rained that night but not for long. We spent the next day driving around and finding nice places to eat and do the tourist thing at. Top most was The Old Inn at Carbost. Very welcoming place with excellent food and local beer. Not only that but a high chair and a children’s menu too. Highly recommended.
That evening we did have to break out some of my anti-midge arsenal as I got bitten quite a lot (as per usual wherever there are bitey flying things) but it wasn’t too bad.
Next day was another walk day. This time up the hills to a natural bowl nestling between a couple of Cuillans. I couldn’t get J up (and more to the point, down) safely at the top end of the walk so I sat and waited in what was gloriously hot and sunny weather. I was wondering whether I should have packed the suncream at this point. As it happened the midges came out and I was bitten quite badly having rather stupidly left my weaponry back at the tent. I managed to keep J reasonably clear of bites though. By the time the girls had come back my legs had taken on the appearance of a smallpox sufferer’s. Once back at the tent the full arsenal came out and we suffered little more hassle from the bitey wotsits that night.
It should be pointed out that the campsite folk had told us that this day was going to be rough weather. There was hardly any wind, and no rain, and it was quite warm. Hmm hardly rough unless you were particularly sun-averse.
The next day started with higher winds but hardly anything to write home about. We spent it out and about in Portree, the only town of note on the island, eating in nice restaurants and poking around shops and that. We did try and get N some new school shoes only to discover that there’s no shoe shop on the island. Madness! Schools are back up here and we were at the bus station area when there were pupils waiting for buses back to wherever they lived on the island (Portree has the only secondary school here). Risking being put on some sort of a register I asked a group of schoolgirls where they got their school shoes. The answer was “On the internet or in Inverness”. Madness again!
Apparently there hasn’t been a shoe shop here for ages. Business op for someone? Oh yes there’s no private physio here neither. Hmmm…
Back to the camp to find that the wind was picking up somewhat. Still normal levels but at the higher end. One family from Manchester arrived at that point and struggled to pitch their tunnel tent for a while before sorting themselves out.
Later that night our tent started bending somewhat with us in it. And the wind really picked up. Blimey it was noisy inside the tent. We didn’t sleep at all for that night. Well me nor R did. The kids slept on, oblivious. I was up a couple of times making sure that guyropes and pegs were holding. One peg bent quite a lot and we heard one rope slacken suddenly as its peg gave up the ghost. Oh well it’ll be over by morning.
It wasn’t. The next day was just as bad. I bought more pegs from the camp shop and doubled up on pegs to the windward side. We decided not to bother cooking breakfast and headed to the Old Inn for brekkie. They stopped serving breakfast at 9.30. We got there at 9.33 and they wouldn’t even serve us toast and a slice of bacon. Major blot on our positive view of the place that was.
That night the wind was as bad at times as the night before. We were happy that our tent could cope now so actually got some sleep. The Manc family told us later that they’d given up and gone to sleep in their car instead worried that the tent would collapse.
They were a lovely family and they had a couple of young daughters one of whom is now officially N’s pen pal. They got on famously for a couple of days before they gave up and shipped out elsewhere.
We still stayed. The wind slackened and it looked brighter. Yay! Got up to make breakfast only to be confronted with what could only be described as a cloud of midges. As I battled to dose myself with whichever anti-midge stuff came to hand, whilst flailing pathetically, I managed to spray 50% DEET straight into my left eye. Bad day.
Not long after this we decided to de-camp whenever the weather was good enough. Then we’d move around via B&B’s. We had dinner at the local (local=15 miles round trip) pub again and got chatting with a pair of outdoorsy types. They gave us kudos for camping (IE they expressed astonishment) as they were in lodges. Then when we told them which site we were on they said “Oh are you in the green tent?” Yes, yes we are. Wow, our tent was noted by other walkers and remembered as a point of interest. Slightly startling.
Once decamped we moved further round the island. We’d had a good evening at a place called The Edinbane Inn. Excellent local pub with musicians playing. Very good guitarist and singer, very good percussionist (despite clear inebriation) and a superb fiddle player. Guy looked like an extra from Trainspotting but good heavens can that man play a mean fiddle! I’m almost certain he’ll have serious shoulder problems at some point (if he hasn’t already) but frankly I wouldn’t want to change how he plays at all.
We went back a couple of nights later and there were more musicians including a total of 4 other fiddlers. One was nearly up with him but the others were clearly not in his league and they knew it. I felt a bit sorry for a flautist there as her instrument wasn’t audible over the fiddles. And there was a woman with a guitar which just seemed out of place. Oh yes and a man turned up with a set of pipes with which he performed a couple of numbers unaccompanied by the others (mainly as his sound totally drowned out the others). He was good but it was a bit out of kilter with the rest of the evening’s bring and share (or in super-fiddle bloke’s mind – come and beat the skills of everyone else).
Our first B&B was a bit out of the way near Edinbane, nice enough but we were happy enough to move on the following day. After a day’s scenic driving we ended up at Seabound B&B in Flodigarry. This was excellent, particularly clean for any hardcore OCD types around. We ended up staying for 3 nights.
And then a shocking long drive home.
Skye – highly recommended.
16 Jul 2011
Varoom!
The last hurrah of my 40th birthday happened this week. My folks had bought me a day driving outrageous cars and we went to do this on Tuesday.
The deal was that we (me and my dad) got to drive 2 cars each round a smallish circuit. I’d never thought of doing this before but it was quite exciting.
The cars I picked were a Caterham 7 and a Ferrari (no idea what model, sorry car nerds). He picked a Bentley (very stately pace) and a Ferrari too.
The Caterham was fun, noisy, bouncy and I struggled to get it up to high speeds as it felt like I was zooming along faster than I’d ever driven before but on checking the speedo I was only doing 80.
I did manage to get the Ferrari up to 100 though (would have been more but the circuit really didn’t allow it).
Unfortunately the majority of the event was sitting around waiting for the 2nd car to be ready.
Ah well, the drives were excellent fun though.
Cheers mum and dad.
05 Jul 2011
Bin Top Model
Oh no! They’ve mucked it up again!
After last year’s shockingly awful debacle of a finale the makers of Britain’s Next Top Model have decided to go for it this year. In a spectacular race to the bottom the first episode (and apparently the next two as well) are total rip-offs of the X-Factor early shows. So we have auditions, deluded folk, tears and power ballads as well as the usual “people to watch”. Twas pretty awful.
One of the many reasons I loathe the X Factor style shows is precisely because of the way they get mileage out of “dream crushing as entertainment”. It may well be that some girls at the audition weren’t going to ever be models but that doesn’t mean it’s particularly pleasant to have their moment in the sun shown to all and sundry as a “hah look at her, Isn’t she deluded?” moment. Cruel and unusual if you ask me. I know that stuff happened on previous serieses but the prospective participants weren’t then paraded on telly like some sort of un-self-aware idiot.
Then there was the numbering of the participants. They all had to wear a number when they paraded in front of the judges. Struck me as a bit identity parade. Perhaps next year they’ll simply tattoo a barcode on them.
And the judges are the same. Grace and Julien are deeply irritating. Charlie is bland and inoffensive, Elle is elegant and intelligent although did have to wear horrendous looking shoes with dangerous looking heels. Grace is doing the Cowell role. I don’t know who the other judges are on XFactor though so I can’t compare the others.
Let’s hope they haven’t decided to go down the “phone in your choice” route for each episode “proper”. That would definitely leave me switching off for good. And so far no word of an awful “live finale” – fingers crossed.
08 May 2011
Bugged
Amongst the list of podcasts I get through regularly is a comedy one called “The Bugle”. John Oliver and Andy Zaltzman host it and it’s usually very funny.
This week, however, they’ve gone and done a whole episode on the Bin Laden death.
Really not comedy gold.
I’m happy to forgive an occasional dud episode of something that’s usually so good. Unfortunately this time I heard it in the car on the way to Leicester. R was with me and I’d just bigged up the show as well worth listening to. So we’re zooming down the M1 and this tedious ramble through barely comedic thoughts wasn’t the introduction to the show I was after.
I was also surprised that the tone was celebratory. Wasn’t really the tone I was expecting.
Ah well.
29 Mar 2011
Late fillum
I watched District 9 for the first time last night. It’s a fillum that was much talked about at the time of its release but I managed to miss.
So what to say about it?
I rather liked it. Mainly in a “that was well done” way rather than a visceral “that moved me” way tho.
Your main actor (Sharlto Copley) was excellent. His portayal of a bloke that we all know (if you’ve worked in an office) doing his job was very good as was his descent into the meat of the plot.
The story was nothing desperately new, nor were the morals: “humans are the nasty ones”, “aliens may not be all they seem”, “money trumps everything”, “alien weapons are waaaaay cooool” and of course “Nigerians are evil money-grubbing bullies and psychopaths” (err maybe not that last there). But I thought it handled them well.
Until.
Oh until.
The last section. It moved the fillum from quite a thoughtful one into a Transformers movie of all things. I guess it was only to be expected; after all what’s a sci-fi fillum without exploding heads and fizzy weapons? I reckon they had to sell the thing to distributors and without the fizz-bang of the ending it wouldn’t have been bought.
Stil there’s ample scope for a sequel (I’d guess that was in the deal as well) to address these short-comings. As we know sequels often improve upon the original…